Mommy and Son Solo Vacay *eeeek*
For awhile now I’ve wanted to go on a cruise. It’s been almost 2 years since my last one and you’d think that working for a cruiseline I’d be going on them more often. Well obviously that’s not the case. One thing that I knew Gary would want me to do is live my life and travel with Mikey because that was our plan. So I put several cruise requests for only the biggest cruise ship in the world, the Oasis of the Seas. I did not think I’d get on any time soon but I was royally surprised when I got approved well over a week in advance, THAT never happens! It’s almost like we were meant to go on this cruise.
I’ll admit I’m a little scared about going on a cruise ship alone with Mikey. I have NO idea how its going to go, but I’ll be finding out in just under a day because we leave TOMORROW!!!! I got us a very very cool Boardwalk view room with a balcony overlooking the carousel. Yes you read that right a carousel! This ship has so amazing things that I don’t think Mikey and I will get bored. So as scared as I am to go on my first solo vacation with my little man, I’m also extremely excited. This is a new unknown for us.
Relay for Life = AMAZING!
Sorry for the long overdue post regarding what happened last Saturday during Relay. I know I promised pictures but I’ve been so busy with work that I just haven’t had the time to catch up with my blog. I know tisk tisk tisk. Such a bad blogger! 
Well, Relay was A-M-A-Z-I-N-G!!!! It’s so hard to describe in words and even via pictures what it was like. You really had to be there. The energy alone of all of the people there being there for the SAME exact reason as you are, was just breathtaking. Seeing the survivors open up the Relay with the first lap was so touching. Made me wish that Gary could have been walking that lap too even though I’m sure he would have bitched and moaned about wearing the purple survivor t-shirt. The 2nd lap was for survivors and their caregivers, since I still consider myself having been a caregiver I decided to walk that lap with Mikey. He totally enjoyed running around the track.
My favorite part of Relay was the luminaria ceremony. Partly because I got to help with it. I got up on stage while all of the teams were working on lighting up their luminaria’s. In mid-speech, once all of them were lit up, they turned the lights off and it went pitch dark. And my speech got totally jumbled up because I had the most amazing view from where I was. To see the track illuminated with these bags dedicated to individuals that lost their fight, successfully fought, or those that are currently fighting. It’s a site, like I said, that can’t be described. Here are some pictures from that amazing event.
The beginning of the survivor lap:
Mikey running around the track for the survivor/caregiver lap:
The 4 luminaria’s that we worked on (one from Me, Mikey, Gary’s mom, and just a generic one for Gary):
Oh and I can’t forget the pictures of the amazing flags that were decorated by the classes at Mikey’s school….
Mikey’s room (the best one but I’m biased), Mikey has a special bumblebee in the middle:
My “purpose”
In the past couple of months I’ve been racking my brain trying to figure out why just why Gary came into my life AND left my life so early. I felt like we had so many unfinished things to accomplish. But apparently he thought that I’d be able to continue and finish some of these on my own.
Well lately I’ve been having these ideas. Obviously even when Gary was alive I felt like I had to do everything possible to not only have him cured but to ensure a cure for others with cancer. Once it hits home, you feel that overwhelming urge to do something. Shoot that’s why I joined the bone marrow donor registry and donate blood every 2 months 
The other day I had emailed our social worker up at the NIH to ask her a question about donating to have a bench in memory of Gary. I remember on many occasions Gary and I would go out to the courtyard and sit on a bench to get outside of the “hospital”. I remember seeing these little plaques on some benches where they were dedicated to an individual. So I contacted his social worker and heard back from her within hours. I have to contact someone else, but I’m crossing my fingers that I can do that. I know Gary would have loved that idea.
Over the weekend when I was going through Gary’s emails I came across a random one from a company that sent him a message through his website. This company wanted to talk to him about his condition and his treatment and how it has affected his life. I felt compelled to reply to them to let them know that Gary passed away but that I’d be more than happy to talk to them if they wanted to talk to me. Well, this afternoon I got an email from the guy asking if I’d be available tomorrow to chat with them. So I’m going to do it. If it’ll help someone, anyone, I’m all for it!
Lastly, but definitely not the least, this one is HUGE in my opinion. While Gary was undergoing chemo he had always joked about writing a book. His cancer book was going to be this witty book, just like the way he blogged. So I got this bright idea over the weekend to attempt to write a book myself, but mesh some (or all) of Gary’s blog posts into the book. It’s a pretty big undertaking but I don’t think it’ll be that difficult because its a topic I’m passionate about.
So we’ll see, if I’m meant to do all of this Gary will guide my way and will help me from above
Relay for Life News Segment
This isn’t the best video, but its better than nothing. I wanted to get the video up quickly. Promise to get pictures up this weekend.
Never in million years
Gosh I feel like those 4 words define my life right now. Ya know, start off every sentence with those 4 words and just add whatever you want to it, and that’s ME. Let’s see….
Never in a million years….
….would I have thought I’d be a widow at 30
….would I have thought I wouldn’t grow old with Gary
….would I have thought that I’d be forced to raise Mikey on my own
….would I have thought that I’d be an advocate for raising money for finding a cure to cancer
I seriously could go on and on. But that’s not the real purpose of this post. Today I had another one of my “Never in a million years” moments. As I stated in a previous post, Mikey’s daycare is raising money for my Relay for Life team. Well today when I got to work after dropping Mikey off I got a call from daycare. Apparently another mom wanted to join my Relay team and had some questions for me so they wanted to make sure I was ok with them giving out my number, which I was. Well they then stated that one of the news stations was coming out tomorrow morning to do a story on our fundraiser! How freaking cool is that.
NEVER in a million years would Gary or I have thought that Mikey’s daycare would be doing any kind of fundraiser like this for my Relay team. Let alone, we’d never ever think that a news station would even care about something like this. I mean there is a pretty good possibility that Gary’s name and story is going to get on the news. How awesome is that!?!?!?? HIS STORY!
I’m so excited to go to daycare tomorrow morning to see all of the wonderful banners decorated. I’m bringing my fancy shmancy camera to take pics so that I can post them here. I plan on finding out the details of when the news plans on airing our segment so that I can somehow get that on video so that I can post that on my blog too.
So yeah, never in a millions year, that’s the story of my life.
Countdown to Relay!
We’ve got T-minus 12 days until our first Relay for Life event as team Gary’s Guardian Angels. I’m super excited about the event for many reasons. I would have loved to have Gary walking with us, but I know that he’ll be there in spirit. He would have loved to walk that first lap with the survivors, I know he’ll be walking it in spirit. But I’ll be proudly walking with Mikey for as long as he’ll tolerate it
One thing that I’m very excited about is a fundraiser that Mikey’s daycare is doing for our team. On Friday afternoon all of the kids were sent home with a letter from Mikey telling everyone about our story. It was very personal and very touching. It was perfect. Not many parents know what happend to us, but most of the teachers do know. The fundraiser that they are doing is turning into a competition between the classes, its rather funny walking into a classroom and they have their work covered up. Basically each class is decorating a flag that will be silent auctioned this Friday. I promise to take pics on Friday and will post them here so that you all can see the fabulous work. I’m especially excited about Mikey’s class’ banner because they are having something special on there just for Mikey. When his teacher showed it to me today I got all choked up. It’s just so very thoughtful. I know Gary would be completely floored to know that Mikey’s daycare is doing this in his honor.
If you haven’t done so already, I’m still not done collecting money Even if all you can spare is $1, realize that whatever you can give makes a HUGE difference. To me its important that Mikey never has to hear that someone he loves has cancer EVER again. So I’ve vowed to help raise as much money as I can to make that possible. You can donate by clicking on this link, please feel free to pass this along to everyone you know Donate Here
More sleazy people wanting my house
As I had promised on another post, whenever I get a sleazy letter from some “realtor” that wants to either help me sell my house or now someone who wants to flat out buy my house for cash I plan on posting the details on my blog for the entire world to see.
Well the latest addition to the sleazy-ball list is a person named Ervin Mendel from MisterPM. He was nice enough to offer his condolences and told me that he knows first-hand that it is never easy losing someone we hold dear. Hmmmmmm unless you’ve lost a SPOUSE I don’t think you get it Mr. Mendel! I have lost loved ones in the past but this pain is nothing like those. To know that my son who is only 2.5 has to grow up without his daddy, that HURTS.
So Mr. Mendel wants to help me. Wow how nice! He wants to buy my house paying in cash and wants to close quickly. Wow how generous of him. I’m kidding of course!!!
So just in case anyone wants to sell their house fast for cash feel free to contact Mr. Mendel because he really sounds like a reputable guy to be going after widows instead of getting his business the legit way.
Oops can’t forget his contact info….
You can reach him by email at info@misterpm.com or by his private cell phone 786-553-7332. Oh and if you can’t reach Ervin you can reach his business partner Sam at 786-546-1415
Sounds like these guys really know what they are doing! Oh how I hate sleaze-balls like these!
Proud of my Mikey
A few months ago I’ll never forget picking up Mikey on a Friday afternoon and getting their weekly “gram” that said that Mikey was the Student of the Week for his class. I couldn’t contain myself and wait the 10 minutes to get home so I called up Gary immediately to tell him the news, he was sooooooo happy. So happy that Mikey got a special “prize” dessert of ice cream. Gary was sooooo excited that he even blogged about it…. you can read it here
Well I never expected Mikey to get Student of the Week again so soon but he did last Friday. Caught me by total surprise. This time he was Student of the Week because of how much he loves to draw. I’m not saying he loves to draw circles and lines like the rest of his classmates. My kid can D..R..A..W! He drew an octopus, that was also purple, he drew this dinosaur or dragon looking thing at home, but at school he drew the batman logo on the day that he happened to wear his batman t-shirt. He’s barely 2.5 he should not know how to draw like this, but he can. So because of that he got Student of the Week. I know Gary was smiling and beaming up from heaven when he heard that. Mikey totally got the artistic stuff from Gary, I just hope he get’s Gary’s brains too Not saying mommy isn’t smart, but daddy was definitely a smarty-pants and I wouldn’t mind Mikey being one too.
Seeing “the” hospital
It doesn’t help that I practically live down the street from the hospital that Gary passed away in. I thankfully do not have to pass by it every day but every once in awhile I do have to pass by it to get to where I need to go. And every time I do, I can’t help but look at that hospital and remember the last morning that I was there.
It’s kinda funny in a way how much I hate this hospital now, a few years ago Gary and I loved the fact that we lived so close because we were on the same power grid as the hospital. Which meant that when we had a hurricane hit us, we had power, whereas everyone around us did not. Gary and I used to joke about how we will never move because of that one reason, or if we did have to that you better believe that would be a HUGE selling feature of our house. Silly guy!
Now in a way I wish I could pick up this house and move it so that it was away from the hospital, so that I didn’t even have to accidentally pass by it. I hope that neither Mikey nor I ever need to go to a hospital because you better believe I’d make sure we’d go out of our way to go to a further one just because this one has way too many negative associations with it.
A recent widow and single mom doing my best to survive on my own.
Last year I told Gary that I'd raise $1k at the 2010 walk, please help me reach my goal. This year Gary is one of the Honored Heroes for the walk so its even extra special to me. :) Just click on the Sponsor Me image to be taken to my fundraising page. Thank you!!!
Help me get to my 1st Half Marathon in Walt Disney World where I will run in memory of Gary :)
