Training Week 3 recap

Posted by Sammy on Aug 30th, 2010 | no comments

All week long I dreaded getting to Saturday because not only did that mean having to be up and ready to run by 7am sharp but it also meant a 50 minute training session. Granted at this point 50 min is a small fraction of the time I’ll actually have to do in January but still right now it seems like a lot

I was afraid I’d cramp up again like I did during Week 2′s session. As a preventative measure I not only drank water before I left the house but I had a banana. I also bought a handheld water bottle to take with me on my run/walk and I also had a bottle of Gatorade waiting for me in the car for the ride home. Surprisingly the 50 minutes went by super fast and I survived. My stats were:

3.59 miles in 50 minutes with a pace of 14’32″ per mile. Not bad. Slower than the week before but that’s ok because I was able to do my intervals the entire time instead of having to stop and walk for a good portion of it. That time is still within the range of what Disney is looking for so I’m good as long as I can keep that pace

Training Week 2 Recap :)

Posted by Sammy on Aug 23rd, 2010 | no comments

On Saturday I had my second group training session with TNT. Once again it was incredible. There is something about being around so many others training with you to achieve something most people can’t or won’t do let alone for an AWESOME cause that just makes it so exciting. Training began at 7am. This time I decided to join the run/walk group since my foot had been doing so well when I did my run/walk intervals at the gym. The run/walk coaches train for a 3/1 which means 3 minutes running and 1 minute walking. I decided to give that a try. About a quarter of the way through the training session I started to tire out a bit so I decided to walk a little bit longer than run which isn’t a big deal. Then when we turned back around for the 2nd half my right calf started cramping up. I decided to take it even easier. What’s odd is when I would attempt to run again the cramps would sorta go away. I still didn’t want to push it because the last thing I need is an injury.

My stats for this week are:

I was able to do 3.24 miles in 40 minutes with a pace of 12’48″ per mile. Not bad, not bad at all!

This coming Saturday will be a 50 min run/walk. If you would have asked me a year ago how I’d manage to run/walk for 50min straight I’d tell you that you were crazy. Now I can’t help but be excited about the prospect of not only doing 50 min, but eventually doing 13.1 miles!

WHY I RUN

Posted by Sammy on Aug 23rd, 2010 | 2 comments

This little poem was in the newsletter my Team in Training Coach sent out today. It’s just PERFECT and really conveys why I’m running. So I just had to share it on my blog because as I was reading it I totally got the chills.

I Run because I am not a scientist and cannot help by research and experiments.

I Run because I can and they cannot.

His Happily Ever After

Posted by Sammy on Aug 20th, 2010 | one comment

From time to time I go onto the Widow boards that I used to frequent early on in this new journey of mine. I have drifted away from those boards because a lot of the time they are too depressing to read. So much hurt and pain in lots of posts and I just don’t feel like I need to surround myself with all of that sadness anymore.

Well today I ventured on the widow boards just to do a quick glance and see if there was anything interesting to read, sometimes there really is something non-depressing to read. I came across a post from a lady that is dating a guy and this guy basically came out and told her that he felt like she was his Happily Ever After, his Once In A Lifetime. Beautiful words to say to someone. It basically freaked her out to hear that come from his mouth.

The first person to reply to her post basically told her to look at it this way, she was her late husband’s Happily Ever After. His Once in a Lifetime. And when you think of it that way, one word…..WOW! You take such a morbid and horrible event and you put a positive spin on it. How would anyone not want to have *THAT* at the time they die? I know I want that Happily Ever After when I die. That’s probably why I’ve chosen to make each and every day of my life right now a happy one because quite frankly I don’t know if I’ll be here. So until I find that Happily Ever After, well I’m going to be happy on my own

Training Day 1

Posted by Sammy on Aug 14th, 2010 | no comments

This morning was my very first training with Team in Training ever. And it was AWESOME!!!! I got up at 6am ready to go, quickly got dressed and drove to Weston. I got there around 6:45. It’s crazy to think that I was up THAT early in the morning to do any kind of physical activity, but it totally didn’t phase me.

I got there and got my training shirt, and drank some water to hydrate myself. They went over some stretches that we should do before we take off to help us prevent injury. Then we broke up into groups, the runners, the run/walkers, and the walkers. I decided to take off with the walkers today because my bad foot was acting up last night. I figured better safe to not push myself yet. Today was a 30 min walk and my foot didn’t bother me at all during the walk. I’m going to try to do some run/walk intervals this week at the gym. If it starts to hurt I’ll stop and resume walking but I need to give it a try to see if my foot is better and more importantly ready to resume running.

I’m soooooooooooo excited for this. Yeah it means my Saturday mornings for the next 5 months are shot, but you know what? I’m ok with that. Because in the end I’ll be doing my first race at Disney having raised a lot of money for a wonderful cause, and more importantly I’ll get to cross that finish line knowing that I’m helping make a difference for so many lives.

1/2 Marathon Training Night before Day 1 :)

Posted by Sammy on Aug 13th, 2010 | no comments

Tomorrow morning I need to be up and at the training location by 6:45am. Yup you read that time right. Crazy right!?!?!?!? I think so! I’m somewhat excited in a crazy and sick kind of a way. I’m basically beginning a 5 month journey that is going to take me from being someone that would never do such a thing to someone that WILL complete their first half marathon. I’m excited about the idea of doing something that most people would never try, let alone do it for a FANTASTIC cause.

I will be posting weekly training recaps here on my blog so that everyone can follow my progress. If you haven’t donated yet and would like to you can easily do so by clicking on the Team in Training link on the right hand side of this page. Thank you for helping out bring us closer to a cure for lymphoma and leukemia!

Anger towards the dead

Posted by Sammy on Jul 29th, 2010 | no comments

Sounds messed up right? How could someone possibly be mad at someone that died? Well I’m here to tell you its very possible, and very very very REAL. It’s a feeling that has overcome me a few times in the last 6+ months. Today was one of those days when I got really mad at Gary for leaving. Kind cowardly if you look at it from my point of view. I knew Gary pretty well and he was never one to just give up. N.E.V.E.R!!!!!!!!

Logically I know that his body just couldn’t take it anymore, but I’ve watched my fair share of movies with people debating on whether to walk toward that comforting white light or go back to their body and well ummmm W.T.F!!!! How could he have chosen that light? Did he not see me freaking out outside of his room? How could he possibly think that *I* could raise Michael on my own? I mean I have no doubt that I can do it, because quite frankly I do NOT have a choice, but still knowing that his father left him when he was 2 and how he didn’t want to repeat that himself, how could he do that to us?

Like I said logically I know Gary didn’t have a choice here. But man if you were in my shoes you still can’t help but get angry from time to time. I totally blame it on the entertainment world for conveying heaven the way they do to all of us.

Running through the pain

Posted by Sammy on Jul 27th, 2010 | one comment

I remember stories that Gary told me of the days when he’d run his marathons. He’d tell me about that wall that you hit where your body tells you no more but your mind basically has to fight with your body to keep you going. I won’t say that I can even come close to knowing that that is like……yet. But I’ll admit that I have thought about what it’s like to hit that proverbial wall and I wonder if I’ll hit it myself on my big 13.1 mile run come January.

Like I’ve said before I’m NOT a runner. Never have been so running at all is a BIG deal for me. Last week was my first week running. I am slowly easing into it by doing the Couch 2 5k program. Week 1 was a BREEZE, except for the fact that I learned that the sneakers I was using were BAD. REALLY BAD! They caused the arch of one of my feet to hurt like hell. I went to a running store and got something to help me with that pain as well as got them to size me up to the right shoes for my feet. Well worth the money!

Today was day 1 of week 2 of C25k and energy-wise I did great. I didn’t get out of breath or anything. My calves started hurting a little but by the time they’d get unbearable my running interval would switch to a walking one and they’d get all better. Once I was done with my 29 minute workout my calves were perfectly fine. But when they were hurting I’d focus straight at the tv’s even though I wasn’t really making sense of what was on. It was that focus that got me through the pain. In my head I tell myself that it really doesn’t hurt and that the pain I was experiencing was NOTHING compared to the pain Gary went through with chemo.

He is going to get me through my training……HE is going to get me through my half marathon! I will NOT let the pain bring me down.

My new adventure :)

Posted by Sammy on Jul 24th, 2010 | no comments

I’m actually very excited about this too. When Gary was going through treatment he had told me about his friend, Josie, who was planning on running the Disney full marathon with Team in Training and wanted to run in honor of him. He was *so* moved by that. I actually got in touch with her shortly after to get more info on Team in Training because I thought it was such a great idea and I was interested in doing it myself once things calmed down with his health. I remember Gary telling me how when he was healthy enough he was going to train with Team in Training and run the Disney marathon himself, he used to be a long distance runner and ran a marathon or two back in the day.

So it was a no-brainer when I got the little postcard in the mail from Team in Training mentioning their info sessions for the upcoming winter season. Which just so happens to include the Disney marathon weekend. I immediately signed myself up for a session That session was this morning and I was so excited to go. Sooooooo excited. Being there and watching their little video just totally reassured me of the reason why I want to do this. I want to do this not only for Gary but for all of the others out there that are going through treatments for their blood cancer or those that will one day get diagnosed. I want a cure for this and like I’ve said before, whatever it takes from me I plan on doing it. So I filled out all of the paperwork and paid my registration fee so that I can run/walk (hopefully run) the Disney Half Marathon this coming January. It couldn’t be better timing either. I’ll be running my first half marathon EVER just days after the year anniversary of Gary’s death. Just thinking about the timing of all of it gives me chills.

I know people think I’m crazy for doing this but look at it from my perspective. I got to see my very healthy husband go from the pinnacle of health to someone that was gasping for air. I got to see him dwindle away to skin and bones while he was on his horrible treatment. I saw him cry when he was in pain….scream when things hurt…and pass out on the floor because his body just couldn’t keep him upright. At the time I felt helpless, now I know exactly how I can help. Yeah I can’t help Gary, but if he could put his life on the line in hopes of finding a cure for his very rare form of lymphoma well then the least I can do is put myself through a 6 month training program so that I can ultimately run 13.1 miles.

So stay tuned. I plan on posting updates. Training officially starts on August 14th Before then I’m hoping to have my website up so that I can start raising my money so that I can actually participate. I have a minimum that I have to raise in order to go in January so I can definitely use all of the help I can get.

A “club” of sorts

Posted by Sammy on Jul 15th, 2010 | no comments

The other night I sat down for the 2 hour episode of Deadliest Catch. I had been looking forward to this episode since early this year because one of the main characters, Phil Harris, passed away about a month after Gary passed away. It kinda hit home only because Gary and I religiously watched Deadliest Catch. I’d probably even go as far as saying that of all of the folks on the show Phil was our favorite. Tuesday’s episode was going to be “the” episode where he actually dies. Crazy that there were camera’s around for that. I had my tissues handy because I wasn’t quite sure how I’d react. I KNEW it would be sad, just wasn’t sure how sad it would be for me.

As I was watching it they’d do their normal boat clips and then they’d show clips of Phil in the hospital. One part with Phil really hit home. It was when he was talking and basically starts apologizing for stuff. That reminded me SOOOOOOO much of the last time Gary talked to me. I remember that day like it was just yesterday. Some of the things that he said just are things I could never forget. I remember him having full on conversations with Dr. P (his oncologist) even though Dr. P was not even in his hospital. I remember him apologizing to me for just everything. Ever since he got sick Gary felt like he was a burden to me, and that couldn’t have been further from the truth. He knew that if the roles were reverse he would have done the same thing for me, granted he’d quickly point out that he wouldn’t have done as great as a job as I had done. It’s that apology that Phil did that really hit home to me. It’s almost like when you are dying you kinda know its coming without really KNOWING its coming and you start making peace.

The other part of the show that really hit me and is really why I named this post the way I did was the moment when Josh got “THE” call from the hospital. At least he was awake when he got the call. But man that’s a moment he’ll never be able to forget because the moment I got the call about Gary is a moment I’ll never be able to forget. I could relive it and tell it in so much detail its crazy. There are things that I’d LOVE nothing more than to forget and me getting that call is probably one of them. That rush of adrenaline that I got was absolutely insane and quite frankly, I hope I never have to have another rush like that one. Anyone that has ever gotten a call like that knows that its something that lives with you forever. It’s not something you can ever forget.